Who's That Tiger?

posted by Big Drew -

Drew is in bold. 

Here was the Tigers line up we gave you today during the show:

1. Jacoby Jones, CF

Really just a stand up guy. Used to go by Jughead and really loved burgers and hanging out at the local malt shop. Prefers clean living and is just out here trying to find love in all the wrong places. If you spot him on Tinder, give him a super like. He could use the self esteem boost. Guy has been down in the dumps. 

Jones was drafted by the Pittsburgh Pirates in the third round of the 2013 MLB draft, and traded to the Tigers in 2015 for Joakim Soria.

Already violated the MLB drug policy twice.26 year old OF is hitting 235 with an on base percentage of .282.

2. Jeimer Candelario 3B

Candles Mario is actually named after the Italian Plumber of the same name. A hero to his own people and the Toadstool Kingdom alike. Candles also does great impressions of his teammates, when he frowns and looks like he hates everyone, you could swear you were looking at Miggy. 

24 years old, Tigers traded Justin Wilson last summer for prospects. One of them was Jaimer Candelario. Switch hitter Team high 5 HR and is building up a reputation of a smart hitter. Most walks on the team

3. Mikie Mahtook LF

After being raised by gypsys in the wild north of France Mikie adopted his last name after he saw his gypsy mother throw a mean lefthook, which she call the Ma Hook. The T is actually  in there because Mikie was never taught how to read and write. In fact, he can't read this to double check if it's accurate. But it is. Trust me. I'm on the radio. 

Batting 3rd and hitting .129 Tigers spelled his name wrong on twitter earlier today. Traded to the Tigers before last season for cash considerations. He has spent more time in the minors than the majors this year.

4. John Hicks 1B 

Originally known for his bat making skills from oaks and maples, John Hicks decided one day that he done producing the lumber and decided to start swinging it. This Montana Monster Masher is also well known for his themed potluck dinners at the clubhouse after hours. Great meatballs. 

28 years old. Claimed off waivers. 2 years ago 3d string catcher last year. Now he’s a regular part of the lineup

5. Niko Goodrum RF

While he doesn't like it being discussed, Niko Goodrum was originally the basis for the lead character in the classic work of film, The Rock. However, to protect his identity, they changed the characters name to Stanley Goodspeed and made the movie about chemical warheads instead of baseball. Still. Based on a true story. 

26 year old utility man. Plays OF, SS, 2B, 1B. Gardy knew of him back when he was a minor leaguer in twins system. 17 career major league AB before this year. Hitting .193 right now

6. James McCann DH

The grandson of the famous Cann Cann family of upper East new Texas, James just plays baseball for fun and to care for his many emus. That's right. Emus. Loves em. 

Probaby heard of him. He’s the catcher who’s dad wasn’t the GM all these years. 4th full season with the Tigers. Best season at the plate with .276 BA. Cannon of an arm. He’s major league quality.

7. Grayson Greiner C

Did you know Grayson actually thought the C after his name stood for Chef? He assumed he had to cook for the rest of the team before games and with a flan like that, no one on the team was about to try and stop him. Grayson also is known for his award winning radio plays about former Batman ward, Dick Grayson. 

Greiner was drafted by the Detroit Tigers in the third round of the 2014 Major League Baseball Draft out of South Carolina. Made his MLB debute 5 days ago and picked up his 1st major league hit. Hit .237 in AA and AAA last year

8. Jose Iglesias SS

The youngest of the famous Iglesias entertainment dynasty, Jose was cursed from birth with a terrible singing voice and the body of a shortstop, not a musician. Many nights, you can still hear him trying to sing the songs of his family like "Hero" and "The Ping Pong Song. "

Diva SS...Longest tenured Tiger in the lineup today. Aqaired in the summer of 2013 in the Avi Garcia trade. Great glove, nothing at the plate. Charming as a young defeisive wizard but now a mature big leaguer leaves a lot to be desired.

9. Pete Kozma 2B

I think this is my dentist. No seriously. Is this my dentist? I need some fillings replaced and my dentist hasn't been calling me back so this would make total sense if he was busy pursuing a major league career. Could really use some help with these bicuspids though....

Just called up...not a youngster. 30 year old. Parts of 5 seasons with the Cardinals. He hit .304! .....In 2014.

Hasn’t hit above .152 since. Really good defensive player which the Tigers are desperate for.

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